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“When you wake up in the morning, reflect on what a precious privilege it is to be alive—to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.” ~Marcus Aurelius
Appreciation.
It once was a highly triggering idea for me, and occasionally it still is.
It has taken time to disentangle what it signifies for me and to come to terms with days when I am engulfed in trauma or sorrow, feeling as if there’s nothing to be thankful for. It’s acceptable to exist in those feelings.
Appreciation is just one of the myriad tools I’ve utilized to adjust my viewpoint on my situation (when I’m capable) and feel slightly better—and it’s one of the elements that has kept me going.
Statistically, I shouldn’t even be here. Not just alive, but thriving.
Are you familiar with the ACEs (adverse childhood experiences) assessment? Well, I nailed (pun intended) that assessment. Ten out of ten, which secures for me… a notably increased likelihood of mental, physical, and behavioral health issues and a diminished life span.
My entire childhood was a whirlwind of disorder. I had parents who were deeply addicted to crack. I experienced physical, sexual, and emotional abuse. Drug dealers came and went from our apartment. Visits from Children’s Aid workers were a frequent occurrence.
I’d often wonder if I’d return home from school, my nine-year-old self, to find my parents dead from an overdose. At times, they wouldn’t emerge from their room for days, leaving me with an anxiety that felt like a boulder in my stomach.
Family and friends frequently ended up incarcerated, homeless, battling addiction, or deceased far too soon.
There were times we faced eviction, and often I went without meals, so I would hide oatmeal packets in my room for emergencies. As mentioned, chaos. Perhaps you can resonate?
This is when appreciation entered the equation. It seems counterintuitive that I’d find anything to be appreciative for amidst the nightmare I was enduring, right? Well, whether you deem it delusional optimism or something else, I discovered aspects to be thankful for.
<p“Oh, a teacher believed in me? Grateful. Oh, I had lunch today and dinner? Grateful. My parents are alive today? Grateful. I wasn’t beaten today; I’m grateful.
Understand, I truly believe that surviving my childhood bestowed upon me a supercharged sense of gratitude that I carry with me now. I believe this capacity exists within all of us, though sometimes it may seem out of reach, and that’s perfectly okay. When we can grasp it, however, it can be remarkably beautiful.
At times, I feel so profoundly grateful I can barely contain it, bursting into tears of joy. I am residing in my own safe space, able to walk into the kitchen and access whatever I desire to eat without fear of violence? Incredible. This feeling of appreciation doesn’t even need to be linked to trauma or sorrow. You mean I can turn on the faucet and receive clean water whenever I want? Grateful.
I possess all my limbs. I have my sight. I can write. I can read. I own a smartphone. I can drive. Grateful.
If we pause for just a moment and reflect on things for which we are thankful, if we can, it can literally alter our brain chemistry. The more we concentrate on what we are grateful for, the more we begin to notice and appreciate other things. It transforms into our default mindset.
Please listen. I’m not advocating for us to pretend that everything is perfect. (Yet when was the last time you paused to appreciate a rainbow?) We are all experiencing pain. Bad things happen.
Survivors of sexual abuse, hello, how are you? I see you. Survivors of domestic violence, hello, it’s nice to meet you. I hear you. I stand with you.
Life is incredibly challenging, and if anyone understands, it’s me. I live with a diagnosis of complex post-traumatic stress disorder—a lifelong companion I’ve had to learn to accept. Some days I want to throw gratitude out the window.
But I recognize how significant it is for my mental well-being, so I persist in working on it.
Here are some actionable steps and lessons I’ve gathered from appreciation. Please don’t view these as mandatory actions or judge yourself on a gratitude scale. If these suggestions aren’t feasible for you, that is acceptable.
Beginning (and concluding) your day with appreciation is powerful.
Starting your day with gratitude can tint the rest of your day positively. This doesn’t necessitate an elaborate, time-consuming ritual; merely one second when you open your eyes in the morning is all it takes. You can spare a single second just for yourself; you deserve that.
To keep it tremendously simple, just consider one thing you’re grateful for—anything at all. It may sound cliché, but how about the simple fact that you were able to open your eyes and see? If you can jot it down, even better, which leads me to my next suggestion.
Write it down.
If you’re able to start documenting things you appreciate, give it a try. Writing things down enables you to track, revisit, and remember all the major and minor elements you feel thankful for. You can carry a small notebook, keep one next to your bed, or note things in your phone—whatever is most convenient for you.
Enjoy it.
Allow yourself to be playful and imaginative with the things you appreciate; your inner child will be grateful. Did you get to watch a cartoon or read a book that once brought you delight? That can be a moment of gratitude. Do a little happy dance while brushing your teeth just because you have the ability to move? That can be another. It can be anything.
Be kind to yourself on tough days.
Some days are tough, and our energy may only suffice to barely make it through. On such days, even the term “gratitude” might feel overwhelming, let alone considering things to be grateful for. That’s okay. Allow yourself to experience whatever emotions you’re going through and strive to be gentle with yourself. That’s enough, my friends.
The wonderful thing about identifying things to appreciate is that the more you practice, the more it can evolve into a habit and become more enjoyable, potentially changing how you view situations in your life.
If you find yourself currently in a tough situation or phase, whether it’s dealing with abuse, loss, divorce, grief, health issues, or just the everyday challenges of life pulling you down, I want you to know that I see you and I understand how difficult this can be. I’ve been there, and I’ll face such moments again.
If you can access gratitude, it may be a helpful tool. If you can’t reach it, that is okay. Please hear this: if you struggle to feel gratitude, it doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you or that you’re failing at healing.
Here are three things I appreciate today.
I’m thankful for having the opportunity to write this message to you, my heated blanket, and the hummingbirds flitting around outside my window. Now it’s your turn—if it’s available to you, please share some things you’re grateful for in the comments below. I’d love to hear them.
Take care, you wonderful humans.
About Jade Dorrington
Jade Dorrington is a writer residing on the territory of the Lekwungen speaking peoples, also recognized as Victoria, British Columbia. He possesses an insatiable curiosity about the world and consistently has a book in progress. When he’s not writing, he enjoys being outdoors, exploring new destinations, and moving his body in ways that bring him joy.
**The Impact of Gratitude: Unleashing the Potential Within Us All**
Gratitude transcends being a mere fleeting sentiment; it constitutes a robust practice capable of altering our lives and unlocking our potential. Research has revealed that nurturing gratitude can enhance mental health, strengthen relationships, and even foster greater physical well-being. This article examines the diverse advantages of gratitude and how it can be utilized to enrich our daily lives.
**Comprehending Gratitude**
At its essence, gratitude involves recognizing and valuing the positive elements of life. It encompasses acknowledging the kindness of others and the blessings we receive, regardless of their magnitude. Gratitude can be conveyed in numerous forms, ranging from a simple thank-you note to a heartfelt discussion. The gratitude practice encourages us to concentrate on what we possess instead of what we lack, cultivating a mindset of abundance.
**Psychological Advantages**
A multitude of studies has substantiated the psychological advantages of gratitude. Individuals who consistently engage in gratitude report heightened levels of happiness and diminished levels of depression. Gratitude assists in redirecting our focus from negative to positive thoughts, promoting a more optimistic mindset. This transition can enhance resilience, empowering individuals to manage stress and adversity more effectively.
**Physical Health Benefits**
The advantages of gratitude extend beyond mental well-being; they also include physical health. Studies indicate that grateful individuals tend to adopt healthier habits, such as exercising regularly, maintaining a balanced diet, and attending routine medical examinations. Gratitude has been associated with improved sleep quality, fewer symptoms of illness, and even lower blood pressure. By nurturing a sense of well-being, gratitude can play a role in prolonging life and improving health.
**Enhancing Relationships**
Gratitude is crucial for fostering and preserving meaningful relationships. Expressing appreciation fosters a sense of connection and trust. Acknowledging the efforts of those around us encourages them to continue their supportive actions. Gratitude can also facilitate conflict resolution and enhance communication, creating a favorable environment where individuals feel valued and understood.
**Developing a Gratitude Practice**
Integrating gratitude into daily life can be straightforward and fulfilling. Here are several effective strategies for nurturing a gratitude practice:
1. **Gratitude Journaling**: Dedicate time every day to document three to five things you are grateful for. This practice encourages reflection and helps you acknowledge the positives in your life.
2. **Express Appreciation**: Make it a routine to convey gratitude to others. Whether through spoken acknowledgment or written messages, letting others know you appreciate them strengthens relationships.
3. **Mindfulness and Meditation**: Engage in mindfulness exercises that focus on gratitude. Meditation can help center your thoughts and nurture a deeper appreciation for the present moment.
4. **Gratitude Jar**: Create a gratitude jar where you can place notes of appreciation throughout the year. Reviewing these notes can offer a wonderful reminder of positive moments in your life.
5. **Share Gratitude**: Consider establishing a gratitude group with friends or family. Sharing your thankful moments can enhance the experience and inspire others to embrace a gratitude practice.
**Conclusion**
The essence of gratitude lies in its potential to transform how we perceive and enhance our lives. By recognizing and appreciating the positive aspects of our experiences, we can unleash our potential for happiness, health, and meaningful relationships. Adopting gratitude as a daily habit can result in profound changes, enabling us to navigate the challenges of life with grace and positivity. As we cultivate gratitude, we not only enrich our own lives but also contribute to a more compassionate and positive world.