The Equilibrium Between Aspiring Goals and Satisfaction with Simplicity

“What if I acknowledge that what I truly desire is a small, slow, uncomplicated life? A lovely, tranquil, gentle existence. I believe that is sufficient.” ~Krista O’Reilly-Davi-Digui

Why do we encounter such a compulsion to aspire grandly? I believe it originates in our childhood when parents, educators, and other adults begin posing the question, “What do you want to become when you grow up?”

One of the numerous issues with this query is its foundation. In school, at religious gatherings, during youth camps, and at home, you are surrounded by others, enabling you to hear, comprehend, and absorb how they may respond to this question. If you observe closely, you’ll notice shifts in answers from one age group to another.

For young kids, the response is quite straightforward and reflects their immediate surroundings. A young girl might claim that she wants to grow up to be a mother. A young boy might express a desire to become a police officer. A pre-teen girl could say she wishes to be a teacher, while her pre-teen male counterpart might aspire to be a detective. A teenage girl may dream of being a singer as she matures, while a teenage boy might set his sights on becoming a football player.

As most of these children transition into young adulthood, their responses will not hold the same light-heartedness and variety they once did. Instead, a distinct pattern will emerge in their answers. The prevalent responses will include doctors, lawyers, investment bankers, pilots, engineers, etc.

There are certainly various factors contributing to this, but the one I wish to emphasize is the aspect of financial independence and everything that accompanies it.

At a certain moment in our lives, we become aware of the influence that money holds, and our dreams, hopes, wishes, and lifestyles begin to align around it.

In my background, it’s common for educators to steer students away from teaching and encourage them to pursue careers in medicine or aviation because these fields typically offer greater financial rewards. Everything else seems less pressing.

We narrate a peculiar story to ourselves which suggests that, as long as money exists, everything else will automatically fall into place. If you’ve reached adulthood, you’ve likely faced the harsh realization of how false this narrative can be. Yet, that doesn’t necessarily imply you’ve revised your ambitions.

Regardless of whether you pursue a career as a doctor, educator, artist, entrepreneur, or another path, our dreams and ambitions often take on remarkably similar forms.

Our aspirations are no longer merely about securing a cozy shelter to call home, but rather about owning a desirable location, income-generating properties, as well as vacation homes.

Our wishes extend beyond just having a car for practicality to owning two or more vehicles, ideally costly and aesthetically pleasing ones.

Our objective has shifted from simply being healthy, to cultivating a body that is not only fully functioning in terms of strength, balance, flexibility, and proportions; it now has to be sculpted, toned, sensual, and essentially a masterpiece to behold, appreciate, and discuss.

Even a basic walk has transformed into something more. You must track your steps, calculate calories burned, and share your progress.

Financial freedom has transitioned from satisfying daily needs or saving a little for emergencies to becoming a side job in addition to your full-time occupation and side projects.

With the rise of happiness coaches, vision boards, affirmations, and a culture centered on positivity, our dreams and wishes are becoming overwhelming. There now exists a formula for dreaming and desiring alongside a standardized expected outcome.

I find it intriguing that nearly all vision boards around the globe tend to look alike. It’s even more fascinating when you consider that we are all brought up in different environments with varying cultural and religious heritages, have different physical appearances, and possess diverse educational backgrounds. Yet our aspirations, dreams, visions, and yearnings appear to have converged into a singular form.

Commonly featured on vision boards are material possessions. The unique residence, the luxurious vehicle, and the sought-after travel destinations. Regardless of our different DNA, bone structure, height, etc., body aspirations tend to be eerily similar if not indistinguishable.

We are all reciting identical morning and evening affirmations of wealth and abundance.

You would be hard pressed to come across a vision board filled with aspirations related to kindness, patience, apologizing, picking up litter, checking on neighbors, staying in touch with family, attending to stray animals, achieving contentment with your finances instead of striving for more money, being grateful that the bus stops near your home and that you currently have no wish for a vehicle, or coming to terms with the changes that accompany an aging body, a pregnant body, an ailing body, a body that has nourished and brought forth new life, or a differently abled body, etc.

Vision boards like this might exist, but they aren’t the norm.

We possess the freedom to dream, desire, and visualize the lifestyle we seek; we recognize this. What is essential to convey is that you can also aspire to less and dream simply, and that your dreams and wishes hold value.

You are not idle. You do not lack faith because your envisioned dream life, the one you imagine and create mentally, those profound wants and desires, resemble something like this:

Walking or biking to your destinations, purchasing secondhand clothing, residing in a modest home, consuming what you cultivate and maintain, crafting your own leisure with what you possess and enjoying it, working and earning less, enjoying afternoon naps, guiltlessly reading on the balcony, spending evenings or weekends simply conversing with others, whether they be family, neighbors, friends, or even strangers, and presenting yourself in life without make-up, or without expending excessive time and money on your appearance.

If you’ve never yearned for an expensive fragrance and are satisfied with a basic body spray or none, your desire is meaningful.

If your teeth are crooked but you don’t feel an overwhelming need for braces, you are not compromising; you, my friend, have experienced the grace of contentment.

Perhaps you prefer strolling, engaging in yin yoga or mat Pilates, or dancing to your favorite tunes rather than partaking in HIIT and sweating it out at the gym. Yes, you may possess wide hips, some cellulite, stretch marks, perhaps a slight tummy, and the workouts you enjoy won’t shape that body, but maybe you are indifferent.

No, you are not idle for not wanting to endure intense training daily for a lifetime just to be an artistic figure for others to admire. If you find peace and value in the kind of movements you relish, that is all that matters.

If you do not plan extravagant vacations but instead choose to incorporate little breaks into your daily existence—be it weekend trips to the seaside, afternoon visits to the beach, or weekly hikes, or treating yourself to a nice meal—these are all means to unwind and experience fresh adventures. You are not settling for a subpar life merely because you approach life differently or economically.

Being financially challenged by contemporary standards should not equate, nor does it, to being deficient mentally, physically, emotionally, in friendships, relationships, happiness, or joy.

You are not inferior simply because you don’t drive a high-end vehicle (or any vehicle), you live in a small apartment instead of a house you possess, you don’t own luxury brands or items, you don’t vacation in Greece, and you attended a minor vocational college (or none at all).

Identify what is significant and meaningful to you, and do not cement it in place. Always permit yourself, your definitions, your beliefs, your values, your dreams, your wishes, your visions, your affirmations, your feelings, your body, and your belief systems to adapt and mature over time and the shifting seasons of life.

Life doesn’t always have to expand, ascend, and increase. It also contracts, lessens, and compresses. This is perfectly alright. All phases of life are worthwhile and valuable, and you are entitled to relish them, be present in them, and find peace within them.

**The Harmony Between Ambitious Goals and Appreciation of Simplicity**

In a society that often celebrates ambition and the tireless quest for success, the idea of finding contentment in simplicity can appear to contrast with the dominant narrative. Nevertheless, striking a balance between ambitious goals and the recognition of a simpler life is vital for personal satisfaction and mental well-being.

**Grasping Ambitious Goals**

Ambitious goals propel individuals to set lofty targets and strive for accomplishments that can foster personal and professional advancement. These aspirations can take various forms, such as career growth, academic distinction, or creative pursuits. The journey towards such objectives often cultivates resilience, innovation, and a sense of purpose. Ambition can drive individuals to extend their limits, explore new opportunities, and contribute positively to society.

However, unbridled ambition can lead to stress, fatigue, and an ongoing feeling of dissatisfaction. The relentless pursuit of more can overshadow the pleasures of daily life and perpetuate a cycle of anxiety and disappointment. Thus, while ambition is crucial for development, it’s important to acknowledge its possible drawbacks.

**Valuing Contentment with Simplicity**

Conversely, the notion of valuing contentment with simplicity promotes the idea of cherishing the present moment, finding joy in daily experiences, and prioritizing well-being over material achievement. Contentment is frequently linked to mindfulness, gratitude, and a focus on relationships instead of possessions.

Living simply can facilitate a more sustainable lifestyle, diminish stress, and enhance mental clarity. It empowers individuals to forge deeper connections with themselves and others, fostering a sense of community and belonging. Embracing simplicity does not entail forsaking ambition; rather, it involves redefining what success signifies and acknowledging that fulfillment can be derived from both minor pleasures and substantial accomplishments.

**Achieving the Balance**

Striking a harmony between ambitious goals and contentment with simplicity demands introspection and deliberate efforts. Here are some methods for blending these two facets of life:

1. **Establish Meaningful Goals**: Align your ambitions with your principles. Setting goals that resonate with your core values can instill a sense of purpose that enhances both ambition and contentment.

2. **Incorporate Mindfulness**: Infuse mindfulness practices into your daily activities. This can help you remain grounded and appreciate the current moment, alleviating the anxiety often linked with ambitious endeavors.

3. **Acknowledge Small Achievements**: Celebrate smaller accomplishments throughout your journey. This practice fosters a sense of achievement and reinforces the notion that success is not solely defined by monumental milestones.

4. **Minimize Comparisons**: In a world dominated by social media, it’s all too easy to compare your journey with that of others. Concentrate on your path and progress, recognizing that each person has their unique timeline and conception of success.

5. **Nurture Gratitude**: Regularly reflect on what you are thankful for in your life. This practice can redirect your focus from what you lack to what you possess, enhancing your overall sense of contentment.

6. **Create Boundaries**: Set limits around your work and personal life. This helps prevent ambition from encroaching on your time for relaxation and connecting with loved ones.

7. **Engage in Fulfilling Activities**: Pursue hobbies and endeavors that bring you joy and fulfillment outside your professional aspirations. This can contribute to a sense of balance and enrich your life.

**Final Thoughts**

The interaction between ambitious goals and contentment through simplicity is a delicate balance that requires continuous reflection and adjustment. By acknowledging the importance of both ambition and simplicity, individuals can foster a rewarding life that honors their dreams while also valuing the beauty of the present moment. Achieving this harmony can lead to a richer, more meaningful existence, where success is gauged not only by accomplishments but by the quality of life experienced throughout the journey.