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“Return to your essence. Listen to the wisdom of your body. Have faith in that much.” ~Geneen Roth
I might be revealing my age, but here it goes… I’ve realized I resemble a paddle ball.
To anyone born in the 21st century: for context, prior to handheld gadgets dominating the globe, children amused themselves with basic analog toys—like the paddle ball.
Imagine a small flat paddle (similar to a mini ping-pong paddle) with a rubber ball affixed to the center by an elastic string. The objective was to strike the ball with the paddle, observe it flying away and then returning, and maintain this process for as long as possible, until the ball returns erratically and misses the paddle entirely.
Recently, while I was flossing my teeth, I was taken aback when my dental crown came off in my mouth. (I’ll tie these elements together; bear with me.) Luckily, my dentist was able to fit me in to fix it the following day, but this unanticipated incident added to an already incredibly busy month.
Other significant happenings this month included a trip with a six-hour time difference (I’ve noticed that as I age, traveling across time zones becomes trickier), a broken (on the second day of the trip) phone that required an entire day of running around town to resolve once I returned home, my son’s recently bought used car (purchased just a month ago) breaking down and needing a tow, and now my wayward crown, just to name a few.
As I said, it’s been quite an eventful month.
I arrived at the dental office thirty minutes early (due to other unavoidable commitments that morning too) and opted to use this time for my daily meditation. I felt the gentle nudge to slow down grow into a more forceful tug.
Side note: I’ll concede that even though I practice daily meditation, I experience phases where I successfully carve out time earlier in the day for lengthier, more intentional sessions, and other times when I barely manage a quick meditation at the day’s last minute. If it’s not clear, this was a last-minute-meditation kind of month.
Once in the office, while reclining in the long black chair awaiting the dentist, I resisted the temptation to distract myself with my phone and instead engaged in some box breathing to create space for slowing down. And yet again, while waiting for the anesthetic to kick in, I chose to simply be with myself.
This was not a moment to rush. I had nothing else demanding my attention, nor any place else to be. It was a welcomed respite.
With my mouth agape, I contemplated all the life situations I’ve been attempting to manage and questioned if I would ever attain balance. Why don’t I return to myself more frequently? Why can’t I just remain centered all the time?
Well, as the saying suggests, everything in moderation, right? If all I dedicated myself to was sitting and meditating or pausing indefinitely, I wouldn’t be facing these stressors, but I also wouldn’t be able to realize my purpose, assist others, connect with family, or relish all the marvelous experiences life offers.
Just “being” is enjoyable, yet “doing” also offers its benefits and is essential for me to become the individual I aspire to be.
Therefore, it necessitates balance, correct? Frequently returning to myself while also venturing out into the world to “do life.”
And that’s when it struck me that I resemble a paddle ball. I am the paddle, and the rubber ball represents all the activities I’m engaging in—pursuing ambitious goals, checking off extensive to-do lists, enduring mundane tasks, cherishing moments with family, and, of course, taking time to center myself.
Just as the ball rebounds back to the paddle when the elastic stretches too far, I continually find myself returning to my core, which then energizes me to launch myself back into the world, and off I go to manage all the significant (and not-so-significant) things again.
Reflecting on this (my mouth is still wide open, but they’re nearing completion), I recognize that at least now in my forties, my ball gently taps the paddle, and that’s a victory. In contrast, my younger years were primarily spent with the ball zipping around erratically, seldom making contact with the paddle.
Nowadays, there’s a gentler rhythm to the process—though I do still find myself veering off path more often than I would prefer. But even this feels more manageable, as I’ve come to accept this truth, and I trust that I will continue to grow and adapt in ways that serve my highest self.
On my drive home, I reflect on how thankful I am to have had my crown reattached and that I seized this chance to slow down and center. I commit to continually finding time to return to myself in a steady rhythm amidst the chaos of a meaningful life.
You see, the trick with paddleball is to maintain a consistent force and steady pace to keep the game in play. If you slow down too much, it loses its energy, and if you attempt to accelerate too quickly or strike the ball too forcefully, you’re bound to lose control of it.
Similarly, in life, a steady, balanced flow is achieved by fostering gentleness and returning to yourself consistently and methodically. When we push ourselves too rapidly or too forcefully or simply go against the natural flow of our being, we lose control, and it becomes increasingly difficult to return to ourselves.
The crown is back in place, and so am I (at least for now). Tomorrow will present its own outward pull, in the form of opportunities, lessons, and/or chaos. But I’ll face it with faith in my elastic tether, knowing that I’ll persist in returning to center when necessary. After all, it’s not about remaining centered all the time, but rather continuously finding my way back home.
**Resilience Strategies: How to Reclaim Your True Self**
In a world filled with challenges and uncertainties, resilience has become an essential trait for navigating life’s peaks and valleys. Resilience is not merely about rebounding from adversity; it is equally about reclaiming your true self amid the chaos. Here are some effective strategies to nurture resilience and reconnect with your authentic identity.
### 1. Cultivate Self-Awareness
Understanding your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors is the initial step in reclaiming your true self. Self-awareness enables you to recognize patterns that could be hindering your progress. Journaling, meditation, and mindfulness techniques can assist you in gaining insight into your inner landscape. By identifying your values, strengths, and weaknesses, you can make more informed choices that align with your true self.
### 2. Embrace Change
Change is an unavoidable aspect of life. Welcoming change rather than resisting it can enhance your resilience. View obstacles as opportunities for growth and learning. When confronted with a setback, ask yourself what lessons you can glean from the experience and how it can facilitate your evolution. This shift in mindset can empower you to adjust and flourish in the face of adversity.
### 3. Build a Support Network
Surrounding yourself with supportive people is crucial for resilience. A robust support network can provide encouragement, perspective, and practical help during tough times. Seek friends, family, or support groups that resonate with your values and can help keep you grounded. Remember, it’s perfectly acceptable to ask for assistance when necessary.
### 4. Set Realistic Goals
Establishing attainable goals can provide you with a sense of purpose and direction. Divide larger objectives into smaller, manageable steps to prevent feeling overwhelmed. Celebrate your progress along the way, no matter how minor. This practice not only boosts your confidence but also strengthens your commitment to reclaiming your true self.
### 5. Practice Self-Compassion
Being kind to yourself during challenging times is essential for resilience. Practicing self-compassion means treating yourself with the same understanding and care that you would extend to a friend. Acknowledge your difficulties without judgment and recognize that imperfection is part of the human experience. This mindset fosters emotional healing and aids you in reconnecting with your authentic self.
### 6. Engage in Meaningful Activities
Participating in activities that resonate with your passions and interests can help you rediscover your true self. Whether it involves pursuing a hobby, volunteering, or engaging in creative endeavors, meaningful activities can offer a sense of fulfillment and joy. These experiences can remind you of who you are beyond the challenges you encounter.
### 7. Maintain a Healthy Lifestyle
Physical health is closely tied to emotional resilience. Prioritize a balanced diet, regular exercise, and sufficient sleep to support your mental wellness. Engaging in physical activities releases endorphins, which can enhance your mood and reduce stress levels. A healthy lifestyle can improve your overall resilience and assist in reclaiming your true self.
### 8. Develop Problem-Solving Skills
Enhancing your problem-solving abilities can empower you to address challenges more effectively. Approach problems with a solution-focused mindset, breaking them down into manageable parts. Brainstorm potential solutions and assess their advantages and drawbacks. This proactive mindset can build your confidence and reinforce your resilience.
### 9. Reflect on Your Journey
Allocate time to reflect on your experiences and the lessons gleaned along the way. Recognizing your growth can foster appreciation for your resilience and the journey of reclaiming your true self. Consider maintaining a gratitude journal to log positive experiences and insights, nurturing a more optimistic outlook on life.
### Conclusion
Reclaiming your true self through resilience is a journey that requires patience, self-compassion, and commitment. By applying these strategies, you can cultivate a stronger sense of self and navigate life’s challenges with greater ease. Remember, resilience is not a destination but a continuous process of growth and self-discovery. Embrace the journey, and allow yourself to flourish.
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